Thursday, November 20, 2014

Peeling back the layers of the at a time.

This whole weight loss thing gets me thinking. It is a bit consuming and probably not what I wanted but at the same time I find myself in places where my soul is just wide open to emotion. I feel a great and profound connection with my Saviour. I am torn right now because I don't go to church but I miss the community of the church of my "raising". However, I am conflicted about things there. Doctrinal stuff. I was walking the other day and having a talk with myself about the fact that I don't know how to handle this and a very still small voice whispered...."Pray about it". How simple. Pray about it. That requires me to be open to receive and willing to hear answers whether I like them or not. Sometimes I can resist that. It's hard. If it were not for the faith I have in prayer, and the strength I know that has come from my Heavenly Father I would have buckled long ago as I have gone through some of the things I have been through as a Mom. I guess I have always known when I have faced some real challenges that it was going to be okay. I feel this way now and as I peel away each layer of what is happening in my life, and face each challenge...I know I have support from on high. My perspective is growing differently and my prayers continue to be that it will continue in that direction. I am learning to protect what is best for me. I have to in order to survive and be successful. It is just layers and layers of junk but it is also layers and layers of letting go, giving up, giving away and setting free old ways, old habits, the old "Me".

No comments: