Tuesday, January 27, 2015

Confession....I binged....

I was very frustrated yesterday because I was mad at the scale. It had climbed. It just didn't feel like it should have and I was angry and hungry and wanted to do something to punish myself I guess. What a way to get back at the world huh? I did something that will sound really funny but I felt like I needed to do. I binged. I needed to just eat something and get it out of my system. The funny part is what I binged on. 2 pieces of chocolate. (60 calories a piece), a large blueberry,banana, unsweetened coconut milk and chia see smoothie (probably 300 calories) but the biggest binge was munching on granola. So that is what I binged on. I didn't eat a burger, or a chocolate cake or make it anything really worth eating....I did that deliberately. I wanted to eat...I just didn't want to eat anything really bad. It's not right, not the way to handle frustration but it's done. I got on the scale and it's down again today. I am not saying it is down because of what I did but I am glad it's down. I think sometimes we just need to let out hair down and stick our face in a bowl if it will get our mind out of that place it's in. My brain was there and needed to be shaken out of it. So I don't regret it. What I am happy about it is that I don't have those overwhelming feelings as I once did that I should throw my hands in the air and give up that all is lost. Nope, on the contrary. I have every reason to keep going. I know this last stretch is going to be a real stinker for me but realistically if it takes longer to get it off, it will stay off and my body is going to have time to adjust to these changes. It is really a good thing...not bad at all. It's encouraging.

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