Sunday, July 5, 2009

4th of July! I enjoyed myself!

Which means I ate things I normally wouldn't. I ate a rib. I ate some sausage. I ate a little pasta salad made with white pasta. I even ate one cupcake. (covers mouth!) I have to say that the cupcake almost made me hurl! I am not was sickeningly sweet and I realized that I just don't miss that stuff AT all. People ask me if I miss sweets and I tell them I don't. It was kind of funny when I had the cupcake to recognize that it just didn't "do it for me" like it used to. I also had corn on the cob...with my diet butter of course...that was a treat! I haven't eaten corn on the cob in over 8 months. Anyway...after enjoying myself I have to shoo away the mind games that want to creep in. I found myself literally pinching my sides not an hour after I ate wondering if I was magically gaining. I got up this morning grimacing afraid to look in the mirror for fear I might look different. THAT is still the battle that rages in my head. I have to be able to enjoy some things here and there and not worry about it. I got to move on. I honestly didn't eat all that much last night but it wasn't the norm so that is why I am a little obsessive about it....and I have to choose not to be. I will wrestle this monster my entire's my reality.


Jennifer said...

Amy Lee, How did you learn to change your eating habits? Did you read certain books, blogs etc? Thanks you!

MyThoughtsExactly said...

Jennifer, a long time ago, before I had my 3 1/2 year old I lost weight following the guidelines of the American Heart Association. I actually sent off for information from them and got in the mail some good literature. That was a "eat more whole grains, lower fat, more veg's,fruit and exercise" type of guideline. So I started with that. I continued to add in what I got from books like Prevention magazine, Martha Stewarts Body and Soul Magazine, and the other articles on the net. I do LOTS of reading...some of it is you have to wade through that.