Thursday, July 1, 2010

Leap...Leap I said! Go on LEAP!

I keep hearing that in my head. Take a this...get out of this box...move ahead...get off this place where you are stuck and reach out ahead in to the future.
"Unless you change direction you'll arive at where your going". Hello, I am arriving at my destination and I DON'T like it one bit.
I hate the waiting and I tell myself NOT TO! What am I waiting for the mysterious "it" that I always seem to be waiting for. That jolt of whatever it is to push me off the cliff and move out ahead. I can't do this anymore.
I suppose it's time for a "sit down" with myself and plan out my strategy. I don't mean wake up one morning and do things 100% different because that is the key to failure in my life. I mean just figure out what small steps I can make to move me in the right direction.
It's time to LEAP!!!!!!!!!!!!
I am making a "wish" list. It's not a list for anyone but dream wish list.
I wish my house was organized. I wish when I opened a drawer I saw everything neatly folded, in it's place. I wish all books were on a "book shelf", papers were in folders in a nice, tidy office. I wish clothes were washed and put a way, floors were always swept and mopped, bathroom emaculate, dinner made, boy in bed early every night after a bath, and I wish we had enough money to enjoy life and pay "Peter and Paul" without me working. I wish I could make the time to sew magical things, or crochet. I wish I could curl up with a book and enjoy it without knowing that I am neglecting the many other things that I need to do. I wish when people came to visit I didn't feel the need to "apologize" because things are in perfect order in my home. I wish when my family came to visit and I felt a sense of panic because I can't possibly get the house perfect like I want.
I wish I could have taught my children at a very young age to help more and to pick up after themselves. I feel like I really failed in that department because I just didn't want to "fight".
It's raining outside and if my surroundings where as I wish they were I could blog and not feel the pangs of guilt I feel right now because there are other things I need to be doing.
So I close "my wish" list for now. I am off to attempt to accomplish something before I go to work and then tomorrow the cycle begins again. Sigh....


The Silly Witch said...

Ah, I have a wish list just like that...

TX Hazens said...

Hi Amy,
I've missed talking to you lately. I know exactly how you feel in this post. Hang in there!